23. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land.

"A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, 

but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones."

Proverbs 12:4

I have put off writing about Proverbs 31:23 because I struggled with it.  Not in the sense that I don't feel that it describes my husband, but I honestly was trying to see how the Lord was using it in my life.  And then I realized that what it tells us is that a wife can greatly influence the success and prosperity of her husband.  Ladies, we have an important role here, and we can aid in the success of our mates, as well as our marriage.

I love the verse in Proverbs 12:4, which describes the noble wife as her husband's crown.  When I think of a crown, I think of a symbol of royalty and nobility.  A crown non-verbally defines a status; a wife can, without using her words, be a reflection of her husband's character to others by her very presence.  She can be the confidence booster he needs every morning!  She can help him re-charge his batteries after a tough day at work, but she can also drain him like decay in his bones.  

 My husband wakes up every weekday morning at 4:30 am.  He is not a morning person by nature at all, and he needs lots of coffee to make it til sunrise.  Since he interned at his current place of work last year, I have woken up with him most every morning.  He drags so much because it is difficult for him to wake up, so I pack his breakfast and lunch.  It is also the time that God has provided for us to read scripture and pray together before he leaves.  Now, I am not trying to toot my own horn, but I know that this blesses my husband and that is why I do it.  It just so happens I am a morning person and so I'm fully functioning the minute I hop out of bed.  

While in a roundabout way it would seem ridiculous if I don't actually HAVE to get up, I realize at the same time that marriage is about serving each other.  It is not always an easy thing to do, but to know that this is an investment that is long-term will make it worth the little contributions every day.  Plus I love him, so I don't mind making him look good in front of others.  In little ways God already shows me that people notice our relationship (and trust me I am not a fan of attention).  I only hope that that can lead to great friendships and being a fruitful witness. 

I am a big believer in the phrase, "Actions speak louder than words."   I absolutely feel that what we do for others says so much more than what we say we will do for them.  That is a crucial characteristic for a follower of Jesus.  Quite often our words are repellent for non-believers.  We think that because we can argue with someone over world-views that we are being effective witnesses, when the reality is that we could be showing these people that we love them with our actions, portraying the forbearance and humility of Christ.  

And with our spouses, God is giving us the perfect situation to practice this attitude makeover; in our very own homes. 

I am praying for all wives who are struggling with this for any reason, that they serve their husbands and support him in public, that way they are fulfilling their roles and obeying the Lord.  It is my hope that it will help us see the bigger picture.  It is a brand new year, so let us revolutionize the modern marriage!  Let us be the light that shines, the salt that enhances the flavor of life.

In Him,

Caryn